It’s been over a year since I’ve had a problem with stories getting mixed up. These two are really a mess.

The Obama administration on Monday offered a raft of incentives for private investors to help rid banks of up to $1 trillion in toxic assets that plunged the world economy into crisis.

As part of Colorectal Cancer Awareness Month, Americans are being urged to schedule a colonoscopy to check for this common and highly preventable type of cancer.

But many people are too nervous or scared to have the important screening test, which is recommended if you’re age 50 or older or have a family history of colorectal cancer.

President Barack Obama said the plan was critical to a U.S. economic recovery, but added, “We still have a long way to go and we have a lot of work to do.”

The most difficult part of the procedure may be the preparation, when patients take a laxative pill or drink to “flush” the colon. This is necessary to make sure the colon is as clean as possible so that the doctor gets the best possible view of the colon.

Public fury over big bonus paid to executives at bailout recipient American International Group has made some investors wary of partnering with the government. But some of the world’s most powerful investors said the plan could work and indicated interest in participating.

The colonoscopy exam itself is probably the easiest part. “The patient is awake, but with sedation, there’s little or no discomfort. Many patients have told me it wasn’t nearly as scary as they expected,” Burleson said.

In an effort to spur participation, Treasury Secretary Timothy Geithner said private investors will not face executive pay restrictions.

The plan is the latest step in a series of aggressive actions to restore credit flows and combat a virulent recession. Less than a week ago, the Fed ramped up its efforts, vowing to pump an additional $1.15 trillion into the economy.

During the procedure, a long, flexible tube with a tiny video camera is inserted into the colon. The camera sends images to a monitor viewed by the doctor. The images can be printed and stored in a computer.

Geithner said investors will set the price for toxic assets through the degree of interest they show in buying them, sparing the government from having to make that decision.

Well that’s just unpleasant. I need to get this straightened out.

It hasn’t happened in a while, but I’m really not surprised that these two stories got mixed up.

Big George Helms had tickets for last weekend’s NASCAR race at the Las Vegas Motor Speedway, but died before he got to use them. He still made it to the track, though.

On Wednesday, NASCAR said his Las Vegas victory was tainted and slammed [him] and his [] Racing team with its strictest penalty yet. [He] was docked 100 points — knocking him out of first place — and stripped him of the 10 bonus points he would have carried into the Chase for the championship.

At 6-foot-5 and 400 pounds, Helms wouldn’t have been able to fit into a race car. But after his death from a heart attack Dec. 28, loved ones decided to try to fulfill the 54-year-old’s dream of participating in a NASCAR race, and arranged for the former logger’s ashes to be driven around the track.

Rival competitors on Monday circulated a photo via e-mail of [him] doing a celebratory backflip off his car, and the cover is clearly not attached to the oil tank. It’s believed that by opening up the oil tank trunk, the air is able to circulate through the car and create as much as 10 percent more downforce.

Driver Mike Harmon taped Helms’ urn to the fire extinguisher of his Nationwide Series car during practice last Friday. He told ESPN he could hear someone squealing when he went through a couple of turns.

“I swear I did,” Harmon said. “I heard a noise I’ve never heard before. It happened just one time, through Turns 1 and 2.”

Earlier Wednesday, while he was awaiting word on his punishment, he said he wasn’t concerned with whatever NASCAR handed down because “it’s not going to change how I drive, so I’m not going to sweat it.”

That likely changed after NASCAR’s ruling, which is the toughest to date toward infractions on its Car of Tomorrow.

Mara Brodeur, a friend who accompanied the urn to Las Vegas, called Helms’ family afterward to describe how it went.

“It put tears in my eyes,” said Helms’ younger brother, Allen.

Because NASCAR does not typically strip teams of victories, the penalty did the closest thing to it.

And Helms will be at the track’s next race, in spirit anyway. His friends spread some of his ashes at the speedway before returning the rest to his mother.

It’s been a while, but it’s happened again. Two stories got mixed up somehow.

Busch was docked 100 driver points Friday, fined $100,000 and placed on probation until the end of the year for reckless driving and endangering a crew member on pit road.

[B]ut after resting in his room, he rejoined the gathering and prepared for talks in Poland on a missile defense system.

NASCAR placed Busch on probation until Dec. 31.

The leaders also worked on a possible deal with Russia over the future of the Serbian province of Kosovo.

While Stewart’s team checked out the damage to the No. 20 Chevrolet in the pit stall, Busch pulled next to Stewart’s car, forcing jackman Jason Lee to jump back and onto the hood.

Bush taped his radio address, met as planned with France’s new president and prepared for talks in Poland on a missile defense system.

Busch and Tony Stewart were both running in the top 10 in Monday’s race at Dover International Speedway when Busch clipped Stewart as he went to make a pass in lap 271.

French officials said Sarkozy told Bush during a working session Thursday that “quantitative targets” on emissions were not negotiable.

“Don’t expect to have definitive answers to a very complicated set of issues,” he said. “This is going to be a continuing dialogue with all interested parties.”

Busch nosed into the wall and Stewart was sent hard into the SAFER barrier on the outside retaining wall.

Bartlett joked that Bush’s decision to steer clear of the other leaders for a while was a “precautionary step” to avoid following in the footsteps of his father, former President George H. W. Bush.

NASCAR parked Busch and he finished 42nd.

Two more stories (source, source) have got mixed up somehow. I thought I had this fixed. Any help getting things straightened out would be appreciated.

At one point, snow was falling at a rate of about 3 inches an hour in Denver. A 125-mile corridor from Colorado Springs to the New Mexico line was under a blizzard warning.

Former President Bill Clinton, saying he was trying to deliver on a birthday promise to his wife, told more than 400 cheering Democrats Thursday that the party can take back Congress if they get Democrats to the polls and pull some Republicans to their side on Election Day.

“We haven’t had a real good storm like this in awhile,” he said. “It dumped a lot of snow pretty quick and then moved on.”

After Albany, Clinton flew to Syracuse for an airport get-out-the-vote rally aimed at helping a number of congressional candidates in central New York.

“This storm really put them over the top,” said Molly Cuffe, a spokeswoman for the industry group Colorado Ski Country USA. “Obviously when you get this much snow this early, it helps generate excitement.”

Clinton said that many Republicans, as well as independents, are fed up with the GOP and may be ready to switch if they are encouraged by Democratic activists.

At one point, snow was falling at a rate of about 3 inches an hour[.]

A heavy snow job indeed.

As happens occasionally, a couple of stories got mixed up and I’m not sure how to straighten them out.

Trying to end a protest by dissident Senate Republicans, the White House says it’s confident it can reach a compromise on proposed rules for interrogating terror suspects.

“The simple act of teaching a child to read or an adult to read has the capacity to transform nations and yield the peace we all want,” the president said at the White House Conference on Global Literacy being hosted in New York by the first lady. “You can’t realize the blessings of liberty if you can’t read a ballot.”

Sen. John McCain (news, bio, voting record), R-Ariz., one of the Republicans not satisfied with the White House proposal, said he was committed to working out a deal but insisted that the United States must hold the moral high ground.

Bush, who lately has been trying to turn the election-year debate away from the unpopular war in Iraq and toward a broader war on terrorism, plans to spend much of the next seven weeks campaigning for fellow Republicans.

McCain, as well as Senate Armed Services Chairman John Warner, R-Va., and Sen. Lindsey Graham, R-S.C., say that would redefine the broader legal understanding of the conventions in the international community.

“It’s just as simple as that,” Bush said. “To be a productive worker you have to be able to read the manual.”

“It’s provided invaluable information that has saved lives of Americans,” he said. “And, surely, there is a way of finding a way forward that would permit this program to continue and, at the same time, do it in a way that is both respectful of our law and Constitution and our international obligations.”

Your help is appreciated.

I blame the whole thing on insufficient coffee consumption, when two stories get jumbled up like this:

Bush, in his weekly radio address, said he will work with allies to get a U.N. Security Council resolution mandating a multinational force in southern Lebanon, where fighting has raged between Israel and the Hezbollah militia.

A source with direct knowledge of the negotiations said the deal had been agreed to, but that he couldn’t disclose financial terms.

Reached by phone at his home in New York, Bush’s agent, Joel Segal, said he wouldn’t comment until a deal had been signed. However, he said he was traveling to Jackson on Sunday to meet with Bush and the Saints.

“This approach will demonstrate the international community’s determination to support the government of Lebanon, and defeat the threat from Hezbollah and its foreign sponsors,” Bush said.

The team didn’t immediately return phone calls seeking comment late Friday night.

“An effective multinational force will help speed delivery of humanitarian relief, facilitate the return of displaced persons, and support the Lebanese government as it asserts full sovereignty over its territory and guards its borders,” Bush said in his radio address.

Bush, the Saints’ only unsigned player, has missed the team’s first three practices of training camp.

Bush and British Prime Minister Tony Blair, meeting at the White House on Friday, said a multinational force should be dispatched quickly to stabilize the region. The makeup of a multinational force will be discussed at a meeting Monday at the United Nations.

The 6-foot, 200-pound Bush had 1,740 yards rushing and 2,890 all-purpose yards for Southern Cal last season as a junior. The Trojans had a chance for their third straight national title, but fell 41-38 to Texas in the Rose Bowl.

Bush averaged 8.9 yards a carry, caught 37 passes for 478 yards and led the nation in all-purpose yards with 222.3 per game.

Bush has charged Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice with working on getting agreement on the makeup and mandate of an international force to stabilize the Israeli-Lebanese border and help the Lebanese army establish control over Hezbollah.

I hope things get straightened out soon.

Open Trackback linked with:
Basil’s Blog — Weekend Wrapup / Open Trackbacks 2006-07-30

It’s happened again. Somehow these three stories got mixed together. How does this keep happening?

U.N. officials said Hezbollah militants had been operating in the area of the post near the eastern end of the border with Israel, a routine tactic to prevent Israel from attacking them.

Speaking from prepared testimony, Bolton called for a “durable solution” to the violence in the Middle East and the need to “defang” Hezbollah.

“For China and for others, we condemn this because I think any attack on the United Nations positions and the United Nations personnel is inexcusable and unacceptable,” China’s U.N. Ambassador Wang Guangya said.

The panel of 18 independent experts, which reviews the practices of the 156 countries who have ratified the 1966 International Covenant on Civil and Political Rights, said it was concerned about information that blacks and poor people “were disadvantaged by the rescue and evacuation plans implemented when Hurricane Katrina hit.”

Several Democrats said during the nomination hearing Thursday that their views had not changed, citing reports that Bolton has alienated other ambassadors and failed to make progress on U.N. reform efforts.

“We did repeatedly in recent days say (to Israel) that this was an exposed position, that Hezbollah militants were 500 meters (yards) away shielding themselves near U.N. workers and civilians,” U.N. humanitarian chief Jan Egeland said. “That’s why it is so inexplicable that what happened.”

The United States must better protect poor people and African-Americans in natural disasters to avoid problems like those after Hurricane Katrina, a U.N. human rights panel said Friday.

Bolton said he had established “good working relationships” with other U.N. members and was making progress, telling the senators, “I have done my best to work with others to advance our national interests.”

I’ve gotta get this obvious computer glitch looked in to.

UPDATE: Weclome Carnival of the Insanities readers. If you like this post, you may enjoy this one too. Thanks for stopping by!

I just don’t know what happened, and I need all of you to help straighten it out. Perhaps it’s something in the tweaking process, or just a tear in the tin foil lining in the computer room. Anyhow, these two stories got jumbled up somehow.

Sen. Hillary Rodham Clinton, sounding a lot like a 2008 presidential candidate Monday, accused President Bush and the Republicans of making a mess of the economy and failing to ensure affordable services for the nation’s middle class and poor.

Clinton, the likely 2008 Democratic White House front-runner, ponied up nearly $3,000 in campaign cash for her blond tresses to get some presidential pampering from acclaimed D.C. stylist Isabelle Goetz.

“They’re not taking care of America. They’re bankrupting our country and failing to address the problems,” the New York senator said, citing skyrocketing gas, college and health care costs and lamenting a GOP “failure to provide Americans with economic security.”

Recently released federal fund-raising records show Clinton shelled out $1,500 in April for Goetz to carefully craft her coiffure and another $1,000 for a camera-ready clip in May.

She passed off both styling sessions as “media production” expenses.

“Once again America needs to work for everyone not just the privileged and the powerful,” Clinton said, adding that Democrats can be the “change agent” this fall by winning control of the House and Senate from Republicans.

To complement the touch-up of her tresses, Clinton invested another $3,000 for makeup maestro Barbara Lacy to brush on some blush.

“Democrats know we must stop passing on debt to our children and start doing what’s best for our country and our children,”

Won’t you please help me straighten out this mess.